Home > Dating Life Before the Wife (aka "the Dark Ages") > Doesn’t my life get weirder every day?

Doesn’t my life get weirder every day?

So yesterday, I was scheduled to meet Stella for our ballroom dance class at 6:30 pm in the gaybourhood. Since I was done work at 4:15 pm, I made arrangements to meet the DS for a beer on a patio at 5:00 pm. (She had to be in the ‘hood to meet a friend of hers later that evening so we would both be able to kill time before meeting our respective co-horts.)
While drinking with the DS, Stella calls to ask if we want to go to some band performance in Dundas Square. We decide to go. So instead of attending dance class, the three of us are hanging around downtown Toronto, wandering around Eaton Centre and then walking back to the ‘hood to meet the DS’s friend.
On the way, Stella tells us that she must do 3 Random Acts of Outrageousness this summer. As the DS is naturally prone to outrageousness, Stella figures that she may have some ideas.
Exactly 28 seconds later, I find myself sitting between Stella and the DS on pervert’s row at a strip club on Yonge St. (And paying $20 for two bottles of water and a diet coke, might I add.) This qualifies as ‘outrageous’ for Stella, but I was thinking she should have put a $5 bill in her bra for the stripper to pull out with her teeth. THAT would have qualified as outrageous.
And in typical femme behaviour, within two minutes, Stella and the DS are discussing wardrobe with the waitress. (Their corsets are provided by the club but they have to pay for their own stockings.)
Today’s tip, as provided to the waitress by the DS: wear gloves when pulling on fishnet stockings to prevent snagging them.
What will I do when both women are in Vancouver for the August long weekend? Who will take me to the strippers?
  1. CreativeGrrl
    July 24, 2006 at 2:02 pm

    That was a fun time on Friday night!!
    Stella is so much fun. Beautiful and witty too. We have soo much more in common than just dating you.  I am wondering if you felt like you couldn\’t get a word in edgewise that night? That may become a common occurrence!! lol  The virgo boi would be our silent, studdly accoutrement: to count on for opening doors, holding our respective hands, paying for silly drinks and taking us home responsibly.
    As for Stella and her need to complete 2 more Iutrageous Acts, I am thinking a lovely, plastic tiara & earings ensemble complete with dinner ring to be worn for day. You know:
    – on the subway to work;
    – in her office through the business day ; and
    – then perhaps out on the patio in the gaybourhood (accompanied by us in order to keep the masses at bay). 
    That could make for an Outrageous Act! She could sign autographs, take in some photo ops with the public.  She could be bannered as the Polyamory Princess. What do you think? lol

  2. CreativeGrrl
    July 24, 2006 at 2:04 pm

    UGH! proofread twice and I still didn\’t catch the \’Outrageous\’ misspelling. Drat!

  3. S
    July 24, 2006 at 3:56 pm

    I think I\’m in big big trouble.
    (But Stella in a tiara in the \’hood would be interesting…)

  4. CreativeGrrl
    August 1, 2006 at 11:36 am

    You do LOVE femmes!!!!!!!!!!
    And the femmes are right!
    I\’ve got your back Stella!

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